Foster Care and Adoption

No, Ryan and I are not fostering or adopting, BUT Ryan’s parents are. They are fostering 4 precious kiddos in the hopes of adopting them and it was a blessing to spend time with them this past month.

I’d like to think that I could take some credit for convincing them to do this, but the truth is the Father was placing this on their hearts long before I was part of the family. For whatever reason though, soon after we got married (5 years ago) I felt the inclination to pray that Ryan’s parents would do foster care or adoption. Ryan would pray with me about this. We started praying, then I started dropping subtle hints, and after a while the hints were probably not subtle anymore. I just knew they would be so good at loving more kids! Ryan’s parents have way more energy than I do!

They surprised us all though when they took three kids (a group of biological siblings) and then added their new little brother a year later. It’s often a beautiful mess and things are often are a little bit crazy, but even on hard days no one would trade it. It’s so worth it!

These kids still aren’t legally part of the family yet and it is still going to take some time.  If you would like to be part of remembering these kids please let Lesley (Ryan’s mother) or I know and we will add you to a group to receive the latest updates.

I get so pumped about folks doing foster care and adoption! Why?

It’s commanded to defend the weak and the fatherless; [to] uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed—and from a social work perspective I can’t think of a better way to change lives, sometimes ending cycles of poverty and addiction in families. Ultimately, we know the Father to the Fatherless and we want to be an extension of him in this world. This is the stuff of Christian songs on the radio.

Children that are stuck continuously in foster care are much more likely to be fall prey to things like trafficking (let’s stop trafficking, right?) or to enter a cycle of poverty and social issues. Sure, not every adoption story turns out wonderfully, and that seems to scare most folks away from even entertaining the idea.

I’m not sure all the reasons why, but when the subject of foster care and adoption is brought up it seems to be followed by a quick, “I could never do that” and, “It’s not for everybody.” It sometimes seems to make folks feel uncomfortable even when you don’t say anything. I would definitely agree that it’s not for everybody and someone could make a big mess if folks were to get involved prematurely….but….keep reading.

I once went to an event in South Carolina about foster care and adoption. At the event they said if one family from every church in South Carolina took one child there would be no more orphans in South Carolina (not sure if that is still the case; I went to the event quite a while ago). I rather liked that idea, and for two reasons. First, it would be awesome for the church to be known for taking care of orphans (except they wouldn’t be orphans…they’d be Maria my daughter or Logan my cousin); secondly, I liked that a child would be adopted not simply by an individual or family, but by an entire community. The truth is you don’t have to adopt to be in support of adoption or foster care. You could babysit, become the cool auntie, pray, take a meal over, be an advocate, be someone's biggest cheerleader, etc.  

I know there are a lot of issues out there. We’ve got a lot of work to do and we can only begin to help these difficult situations with his strength sustaining us. Today though—will you join me in praying for those involved with children in the US foster care system? Would you ask that the right families would be raised up for these children? The social workers in the area where my in-laws live are desperately looking for families. They’ve even asked them if they have friends because right now they are forced to send kids into situations which are not ideal, because they have no other choice.

Many thanks!

Melissa