An Emotional Experience, A Wonderful Community

This past month I’ve cried a lot. Going home and coming back has been quite the emotional experience for me and I feel that usually I’m not an emotional person. I felt tears coming on when we first landed on American soil; I held back emotion as I sat in the pew watching my now sister-in-law come down the aisle to my brother-in-law; I had tears come when I had to say goodbye to my in-laws; I broke down in my room at my parents’ house when I saw it was just how I’d left it a year before; and I shed tears when I had to say goodbye to my parents at the airport. When we got on the plane the night we left Atlanta and the lights were dimmed I looked out the window and tears came again. I was filled with the faces of friends and family that I love dearly and people who I know love me: those who have loved me from the day I was born to friends I have met in between, and to people who have only recently adopted me into their lives.

Why so emotional? Part of it might be that it is a shock to my system. My life in the capital city of Cambodia is very different from the life I lived in small-town USA. Honestly, the day-to-day task of living in Cambodia makes living here difficult. The numerous doctors’ visits I was making in SC were also draining and frustrating as it took away from time that I wanted to be spending with people, but that is another story. While those are valid reasons for an emotional experience neither one compares to the emotions I feel surrounding seeing people I miss and love.

I have experienced rich, deep community in the US. The kind that some people never experience. The kind that the Father brings together that makes you honestly wonder how it is that you are blessed with such a wonderful thing. While in the US we sat down with our friends, Ken and Mary. They mentioned how they have seen people move out from the community and really mourn the loss of it. They didn’t stop there, though; they challenged us that since we have experienced this kind of community it is our responsibility to replicate it wherever we go. But the truth is that to create such community takes a lot of hard work. It takes vulnerability, being honest when it hurts, walking with people through joy and pain, and sometimes it even means calling each other out. It takes sharing, and time well-spent together. Yet it is so worth it, and wells up emotions in me that I can’t really find words to express.

It was difficult saying hello and goodbye again and again. I like to say, “See you next time,” and make a quick exit. It’s like leaving a child in the nursery. Sometimes it goes so much smoother when the parent sets the child down, hands them a toy, and leaves quickly. When they give a prolonging goodbye it is sometimes more traumatizing for everyone involved.

Anyway, all that said, it was so wonderful to go home, and so rewarding and encouraging—but not always easy. On the same note though, I have been very encouraged returning here to Cambodia and feeling embraced and welcomed by the communities here.

This is the conclusion of the matter. He made us to live in community. Once you’ve surrendered to that gift, you can never be the same person again.

What kind of community are you building?

-Melissa